Negotiation - Like Bear Wrestling

Submitted by: , APR President

Greetings:
Even though people don't spend much time thinking about it, we all negotiate something on a daily basis. It may be as complex as bargaining for the best price on a car or in a business deal. However, it is more likely to be attempting to convince the person with the remote to stop on your favorite show, or getting the guy in the next cube to stop whistling.

Negotiation is about communication and exchange of value. Sound like marketing? The only difference is that your "market" generally consists of a single person. You state your point of view, and they state theirs. The more persuasive you are in your communication of counter-points and concessions, the more quickly you will reach a mutually beneficial outcome.

Assuredly, reaching a compromise can be anything but easy. In really serious negotiations, when both parties are completely aware of what's going on, it can be a lot like wrestling a bear.

Having actually "wrestled" a 550 lb. Alaskan brown bear, in hindsight, I learned a lot about the negotiation process. Imagine the tough people you negotiate with are big and furry while reading these examples:

1. More often than not, you are not very well acquainted with the bear.
   
   
2. If you're not the only one competing with the bear, go last, and learn from the mistakes of others.
   
   
3. The harder you push against the bear, the less patience he will have with you.
   
   
4. Therefore if the bear thinks you're dancing, you'll dance. If he thinks you're wrestling, he'll crush you.
   
   
5. Keep your eye on the bear's handlers; they may have more control over the situation than the bear.
   
   
6. The longer you keep the bear dancing, the more progress you will make toward your goal.
   
   
7. If you can dance long enough, even if the bear puts you down hard, he will just lick your face rather than bite your head off, so you can try again another day.
   
   
8. When it's all over, one of you will walk away smelling more like the other than before things started. Sometimes that's good for you, other times you just need a really good bar of soap.

May your voice always be above the noise - MCP

, APR
President, Sopra Voce Communications
952.881.3426